Permission to Grieve
It's okay to slow down, and breathe, and grieve
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“Permission To Grieve”
A poem by Stefano Ganddini
Sometimes you have to stop holding yourself together,
and let yourself completely fall apart.
Sometimes you have to stop pretending to be okay,
and admit to yourself that you’re not.
Sometimes you have to stop trying to be productive,
and give yourself permission to just breathe.
Permission to rest.
Permission to grieve.
Because you can only outrun the grief for so long.
Eventually, it will catch up to you, and you will have no other choice but to slow down and to feel it all.
Because the truth is,
You are not where you thought you’d be by now,
and even though you know that God still has great plans for you,
it still hurts to let go of all the plans you had for you.
But it must be done, so here’s your permission slip to let yourself mourn whatever needs to be mourned.
And even though the world may say, “real men don’t cry.”
We know that’s a lie because even Jesus wept when his friend Lazarus died.
So ignore the world for just a moment, and let yourself weep.
Weep over the gap between where you thought you’d be by now and where you actually are.
Weep over the missed expectations and the imagined manifestations and all of the timelines that never came to be.
Weep over the former versions of yourself and all the people from your past that are no longer a part of your world today.
Let them all go. Set them all free, and most importantly, set yourself free.
Sometimes we never let ourselves pause or grieve or honor our own humanity because a part of us still believes that God’s love is contingent on our hyper-productivity.
But God is not impressed by self-violence disguised as self-discipline.
And when His son says, “I’m tired and I can’t go on anymore.”
His response is not “try harder.”
It’s, “Come and sit with me.”
So go and sit with Him.
Lean back into the loving arms of your Heavenly Father, if even for just a brief moment, and let Him hold you.
Let Him speak new life into you as you take a deep breath and know that He loves you.
Take a deep breath and rest and grieve and know that you can trust in His love—a love that is like no other.
Let Him bind up the wounds of your heart,
and soon you will see,
there’s a big difference between giving up and giving up control.
As my Mom always used to say,
“Just do your best, and let God do the rest.”
You are not behind,
and this is not the end.
But for now, it’s okay for you to slow down, and breathe, and grieve.
In case you missed last week’s post:
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