New Year Systems, Korean Sauna Revelations, & Fatherly Love
Monthly Reflection | Jan 2025
Dear readers,
First off, I want to give a warm welcome to those of you who are new here.
Since sharing a “note” about my testimony a few weeks ago, I’ve gained 77 new subscribers. This has been my most engaged with piece of content on Substack so far, with 590 likes, 70 comments, and 29 restacks (as of when I’m writing this). I am greatly humbled and encouraged to see that this note resonated with so many people. All glory to God.
In case you missed it, here’s the note:
Side note: For whoever is interested/those who have asked… I have a YouTube video with a much more detailed and in-depth version of my testimony, which you can watch here (warning: viewer discretion advised).
Newsletter Update
Moving on, I’m excited to share that this “newsletter” you’re reading right now will be the first of a new series of monthly reflections that I plan on releasing moving forward.
Before I get into today’s reflection for the month of January, I do want to apologize (again) for the delay since my last post. There are several reasons (read: excuses) I could give for this delay (e.g. the busyness of the holidays, the busyness of my new job, etc.), but at the end of the day, none of these excuses would address the root cause for my lack of posting.
While there is some validity to my excuses, after some reflection I’ve come to realize that real reason I have not posted recently is not actually due to busyness, but due to a lack of clarity. Allow me to elaborate.
While I was correct in acknowledging in my last post that this new season of my life was going to require an adjustment in the frequency at which I was publishing (a weekly publishing schedule was no longer realistic with all of my other current commitments and priorities), I was foolish to leave the frequency open-ended. I said I was going to aim to publish at least one article per month, and it’s now been over two months since my last post. Oops.
Perhaps it’s just my neurotic nature (most likely), but I’ve come to realize that if I do not commit to a publishing schedule with hard deadlines, then I’ll always find a reason to avoid hitting the publish button.
My brain highly dislikes ambiguity, and when I reflect on the entirety of my life (including the years I’ve been most consistent with my writing), it’s very apparent to me that I am at my best when I have clear schedules, routines, and systems in place.
Another side note: I suppose there is a reason why I got my degree in systems engineering, after all. Even though I never ended up working as a systems engineer, I think I’m coming to a healthy acceptance of the fact that the strong inclination I have towards systems, structure, and order is an inseparable part of my nature.
As much as I like the idea of being able to publish “whenever I feel inspired,” the reality is that this simply is not my M.O.1 Whether I like it or not, the reality is that I’m the type of person who needs to commit to clear deadlines in order to get things done.
As the wise Yoda once said…
“Do or do not. There is no try.”
Okay, Yoda. You right.
Instead of trying to publish once per month, I’m just going to do it.2
My New Commitment
As of today, I am now committing to publishing once per month.
Ah… I feel so much better already. Yay for clarity.
This monthly newsletter, as mentioned, will be a reflection on the previous month. I already do a monthly review at the end of each month anyway, so I figured I may as well share it publicly. I normally do my monthly reviews in a spreadsheet3 because I’m a low-key nerd and I love spreadsheets, but it wouldn’t require too much additional time/effort to write it out into a newsletter format. If anything, this will just force me to perform my reviews with even greater precision and intentionality.
My hope is that these monthly reflections will be a high-value addition to your life, and simultaneously will also serve as a public journal of my journey, where I document the biggest lessons and insights I’m learning in my life in real-time.
While it’s certainly possible that I may publish other articles in addition to these monthly reflections, I can’t make any promises. For now (until further notice), these monthly reflections are what I can confidently and cheerfully commit to.4
So, without further ado… here are a few reflections on the first month of 2025.
Monthly Reflection | January 2025
Wins
My first big win for the New Year was getting crystal clear on my goals, and more importantly, my systems for 2025.
I’ve experimented with many different year-end reviews and New Year planning systems over the years, but this year I was inspired by a post I came across by Austin Belcak on LinkedIn:
This post really struck a chord and brought me back to my love for systems.
I think Austin hit the nail on the head in highlighting the two main reasons why systems (i.e. process-oriented actions) are superior to goals (i.e. outcome-oriented results).
In a nut shell: systems are in your control, outcomes are not.
So rather than obsessing over what’s not in our control, we are much better off placing our focus instead on what we can control, and then surrendering the rest to God.
Admittedly, I do still have some outcome-oriented goals for 2025, but I’m holding onto these very lightly. Meanwhile, I’m channeling the majority of my energy and focus into my daily, weekly, and monthly systems.
Here are my 2025 systems:
I do not have control over the outcomes of this year (that’s up to God), but what I do have full control over are these 18 systems I’ve outlined above.
As long as I can commit to these systems—these disciplines—then this year is going to be a good year. And just as I’m committed to publishing my monthly reflections here on Substack (system #16), I am equally committed to these 17 other systems.
So, yeah… it’s going to be a good year.
Revelations
My first big revelation of 2025 happened as most revelations tend to happen — you know, when you’re sprawled out on your back, praying in a Korean Sauna.
Okay, maybe not as most revelations tend to happen… but a true story, nonetheless.
Important side note: If you’ve never been to a Korean Sauna, I highly recommend it. I don’t know if all Korean Sauanas are made the same, but the one I go to near my home offers five different Korean style, family friendly “Jjim-Jil-Bang” rooms (aka saunas, salt rooms, and ice rooms) that offer various health benefits including enhanced circulation, improved mental clarity, deep relaxation, overall wellness, etc.
Just a heads up though, if you do ever go to a Korean Spa/Sauna, do not be surprised to see people fully naked in the gender-separated hot-tub/bath areas. This is normal in Korean culture, but obviously not so much in western culture. You can simply avoid this area if you’re not comfortable with it.
As someone who has suffered from chronic lower back pain for over a decade, saunas are incredibly soothing for my back.
I’d been to this particular Korean Sauna many years ago, but I hadn’t been since moving back home in 2022. This past month, however, my back was hurting pretty bad, so I finally decided to make a visit. And I am so glad I did.
Number one, because within minutes of lying down and beginning to stretch my back in the first sauna room I immediately experienced tremendous relief from my back pain.
And number two, because I experienced a profound moment—dare I even call it a revelation—when I was praying in the fourth sauna room.
While I was praying in this sauna, I had a profound moment where God spoke to me. Not in an audible way—and I don’t feel called to share the details on what was said because it feels deeply personal—but I’ll just say it was exactly what I needed to hear.
It brought tears of gratitude to my eyes and elicited the following response from me:
“My Lord,
All I want is more of You.
Nothing else will do.”
As I proclaimed these words, more tears fell down my face and I felt a deep transcendent peace and joy wash over my soul.
Luckily there was only one other person in the sauna room with me at the time (she wasn’t paying me any attention) and plus I was already sweating bullets by that point, so I doubt the tears would’ve been recognizable anyway.
To be honest, I think I’m still receiving the fruits of this experience, but after letting myself relish in that revelation for a few moments longer, I came out of that sauna truly feeling like a new man.
My north star had been re-calibrated and the weight of the world I had been carrying on my shoulders had been released.
Thank you, Jesus.
An Invitation
I want to share an invitation that was given to me by my new spiritual director, Father Gabriel, when I met with him on the last day of January.5
Final side note: I’m happy to share that after two years of searching for a spiritual director, I’ve finally found one. It’s actually an awesome story of how exactly this came about (which perhaps I’ll share another day), but today I just want to share the biggest takeaway from my first meeting with him.
The invitation is this:
Receive the Father’s love.
This is a message that has been speaking to me ever since I came back Home to the Catholic Church in 2022. But hearing these words again, in such a loving and direct way from Father Gabriel, has struck a deep chord in my soul.
As I continue to reflect on these words, and as I continue to lean into the invitation—to open my heart to receive my Heavenly Father’s love—there is a deep healing happening inside of me. It’s hard to put into words, but it feels like certain parts of my heart which have been broken are being mended back together.
As I write this, I’m reminded of Isaiah 43:18-19:
“Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?”
I’ve also started to realize how much I’ve rejected the Father’s love in the past (the love of both my Heavenly Father and of my earthly father), and I’ve repented with a deep sorrow for all of the times I’ve done so.
There’s so much to be said about this. The “father wound” is a huge topic that I believe is at the core of so many of the issues we see in our modern-day, post-Christian culture.
It’s often understood that our relationship with our earthly father sets the stage for our relationship with our Heavenly Father, and unfortunately, our earthly fathers are often poor representations—and even if they’re good representations, they’re still imperfect representations, at best—of our Heavenly Father.6
The good news is that however our earthly fathers may have failed to love and provide for us in the ways we most needed growing up, our Heavenly Father never does. Unlike our earthly fathers, our Heavenly Father loves us perfectly… without fail, without question. And He, and He alone, can more than make up for whatever our earthly fathers may have been lacking.
The only question is, are we willing to let Him love us?
Are we willing to let Him heal us?
Are we willing to be filled with His perfect love?
If you take away nothing else from this newsletter, I hope you remember this:
Your Heavenly Father loves you, He delights in you, and He wants nothing but the absolute best for you.
Work Updates & A Humble Request
I wasn’t sure where to include this, but I wanted to include it somewhere.
As I mentioned in my last post, I’ve decided to make a career pivot into the field of data analytics. I’m happy to share that I’m currently 75% complete with the Google Data Analytics Professional Certificate I’ve been working on for the last few months. My goal is to complete this certification by no later than March. Once that’s complete, my plan is to create an online portfolio to showcase my data analytics skills and hopefully be ready to start applying for Junior Data Analyst roles come late April/early May.
Since I’m particularly interested in working as a Data Analyst at one of the FAANG companies (Facebook, Apple, Amazon, Netflix, or Google), here is my humble request:
If you (or someone you know) work at one of these companies, I’d love to connect.
If you (or someone you know) do not work at a FAANG company but work in the field of Data Analytics/Data Sciences, I’m open and grateful for these connections as well.
If you (or someone you know) don’t work at a FAANG company or in the field of Data Analytics/Data Sciences, but you’d still like to help, the best thing you can do is say a quick prayer for me—that God will open the right doors for me and guide me to wherever He wants me.
Thank you in advance for any connections, and especially for your prayers.
In other news, my part-time barista job is continuing to go well. I was promoted to “Shift Lead” in December, so I have a few additional responsibilities now (like placing inventory orders for the store) and I started working slightly more hours in January.
Being a barista is humble, hard work and although I’m well-aware this job is only a temporary stepping stone along my journey, I’m deeply grateful for this season of my life. I genuinely enjoy making coffee and being of service to both my teammates and my customers.
It’s a blessing to bless others—even in such a small way as when someone is ordering their cup of coffee—and I pray God will continue to use me to do His will there, for as long as He desires me to be there.
Until Next Time
That’s a wrap for today. I hope you enjoyed this monthly reflection.
I’d love to hear your thoughts, comments, questions, etc.
What was your key takeaway? How was your first month of 2025? What revelations have you had recently?
Wishing you a most blessed month (and year) ahead.
The best is yet to come.
Sincerely,
Stefano G.
Verse of The Month:
“For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.”
- Psalm 139:13-14
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M.O. is short for "modus operandi," which means “method of operation.”
All of that being said, given this is a completely free publication—and I plan to keep it that way—I’m also using this as an opportunity to practice not being too hard on myself and to remind myself (and you) that this newsletter will likely continue to change and evolve over time. I’m figuring this out as I go. Thank you for your patience.
If anyone is interested in a copy of the template I use for my monthly review spreadsheet, let me know and I’d be happy to share it with you.
“Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” (2 Corinthians 9:6)
Real name changed for privacy.
My earthly father is a very good man and I am immensely grateful for all he has done for me. And yet, he is an imperfect man, as all men are. We’ve had a rocky relationship in the past, but God is doing a new thing. Our relationship is healing and growing, and I have great hope for what is yet to come.
Love this reflection. l especially love that you didn’t feel called to share the details of what God spoke to you. As writers on a public platform, I think we can learn a lot from Mary, who constantly treasured things up in her heart. What an encouragement for me!
Grateful to have stumbled upon this post and your substack! What a blessing. I also love the verse you shared from Psalm 139 - it was a pivotal part of my own growth and personal discernment of God's will for my life.